Photo: MLive
I want you to get swept away out there.
I want you to levitate.
I want you to sing with rapture.
Be deliriously happy,
or at least leave yourself open to be.
Love is passion, obsession,
someone you can’t live without.
I say, fall head over heels.
Find someone you can love like crazy,
who will love you the same way back.
How do you find him?
You forget your head and you listen to your heart.
There’s no sense in living without this.
To make the journey and not fall deeply in love, well,
you haven’t lived a life at all.
But you have to try, because if you haven’t tried,
you haven’t lived.
Photo: favspottr on Flickr
In the movie Meet Joe Black, a lot of really wonderful things are said.
I always go back to it. I always think “levitate. rapture. passion.”
All those things.
There may not be any deep love for me at the moment-
but things like this-
words like this and ideas like this-
they keep the belief there.
I see it in my family.
My mom and dad’s love for one another.
Deliriously happy.
There’s an image in my mind that I cannot shake these days.
It is half memory- half vision of a dream.
It is perfect.
This has been a hard month.
February has been mad at me.
But last night there was a twinkle of light-
hours of undiluted delight.
I realized that true friends can be made at any time,
during any season, even amidst months that are mad at you.
This friend had me over for dinner and wine…
but it was so much more than that.
It was a solidification of parallels.
Photo: James Crowle on Flickr
Like a maniac, I have been working relentlessly from home tonight. I was pounding away at my keyboard furiously for hours on end…when suddenly, BAM! the system automatically shuts down. I always forget (especially when I’m on a role) that our cut off is 11pm. Why? WHY? Son of a bitch! I wanted to cry. In all honesty, it’s probably a blessing. I really should just go to bed. Perhaps the powers that be are trying to tell me something?
I need to lose myself in my dreams tonight.
My shoulders are soft and these pillows on my bed give perfect support for my tired mind. I have a light that looks like a giant ice cube. I put it on dimly when I climb into bed.
Its soft hum comforts me.
I am reading “Letters to a Young Poet” by Rilke.
It’s so beautiful-describing the way an artist lives, the way he has to live, to be, to create. Describing the sadness that sometimes comes-how complicated relationships can be.
It is decidedly so…
that you must do what you love,
that it takes all your life to know who you are,
that there is no need to rush this,
that I am doing all these things.
Photo: The CW
Alright ANTM fans…our trash tv Wednesdays have been revived now that the tenth cycle of America’s Next Top Model is officially underway. I always find the premiere episodes to be a bit of a blur. You don’t know who any of the girls are yet and there are way too many of them to keep track of. Thirty girls are in the running at the beginning of the show-by the end of the first episode, the contestants are cut down to a carefully selected fourteen. Up and coming excitement for this cycle? The apartment will be in New York City. That’s reason enough for me to want to watch right there. Plus, there certainly seems to be some personality in this group of hopeful chicas. There has been lots of drama and energy (and mild catfighting) right out of the gate with these babes. I often wonder how much of the dialogue is carefully scripted by diligent writers trying to up the controversy quotient, while being egged on by pushy producers and television execs. Either way, the show is entertaining for the most part, and what I enjoy about it is the inside look at the industry. I’m finding that I’m part of a minority group who still actually likes Tyra…and though I agree that she can be a little over the top at times (ok, waaaaay over the top), and that the show itself has its moments of serious cheese…something keeps me hooked. Whatever that something is, I tune in each and every cycle, like an old habit.
The judging panel seems to be a little bit more honest (mean?) this season. This should be interesting if it continues.
I realize that it’s a little premature to make any wagers, but my preliminary favourites are Claire and Katarzyna. I also like Allison. I think Marvita has got to be one of the most annoying model wannabes in the show’s history. Um, pretty sure there’s a reason why she was not selected in the past. Her attitude (and her bad hair) have gotta go. Fatima seems like too much of a shit disturber to be among my favourites…which means that she will likely stick around for a while to keep things interesting.
What do you think fellow ANTM addicts? Thoughts about the premiere and first impressions of the fresh cycle of ladies?
I don’t feel the need to sugar coat here, folks so I’m just going to say it: I thought that last night’s Academy Awards were a bit of a snooze fest. I think I tend to build it up, and forget that I enjoy the tradition of watching it more than the actual show itself. Had it not been for the witty banter with my family, the tasty homemade spaghetti in my belly and the handsome charm of Jon Stewart, I don’t know that I would have been entertained or satisfied at all.
I was pleased that Javier Bardem won the Best Supporting Actor honour, as I thought that his performance in No Country For Old Men was brilliant…that being said, it’s not my kind of movie. at. all. So Best Picture? I know I’m going to get heat for saying this but…that film was just not for me. I do think he’s amazing and definitely look forward to seeing future projects from the man though. I was stoked to see Daniel Day Lewis take the Best Actor statue home for There Will Be Blood. Lewis is a phenomenal actor, one of my favourites. Always humble and gracious. Genius.
I fell in love with the beautiful French actress Marion Cotillard, who won Best Actress in a Supporting Role for her performance in La Vie En Rose. This is one of the films that I haven’t seen, but am dying to. Marion plays the role of Edith Piaf in the film.
The beautiful and brilliant Diablo Cody, writer of Juno, and the winner for Best Original Screenplay deserves props for her fresh and hot red carpet style (and for daring to be herself). I especially love her turquoise skull cocktail ring.
Katherine Heigl was one of the presenters last night. I thought that she looked really beautiful. I’m always a fan of a blonde in red. Glamour at its finest.
Cameron Diaz was another Hollywood babe on the red carpet. I always think she looks great. Last night was no exception. She has a kind of carefree style which I think is hot.
First time attendee and nominee Ellen Page, who was up for her role in Juno looked adorable in a simple black vintage dress. She told Jeannie Becker on the red carpet that she bought the dress at a store called ‘Decades.’
Whose red carpet look was your favourite? Thoughts on the show? The winners? The fashion?
You can find a complete list of all the winners here.
All photos: Just Jared
Image: Audio Excellence
Photo: ZVents
Image: Popsugar
Photo: Movies.com
“I decided to stop pitying myself. Other than my eye, two things aren’t paralyzed: my imagination and my memory…”
Shannon agreed to see it for a second time because it’s so amazing, so last night we headed uptown to see the film. Admittedly, I haven’t been motivated to write much of anything this week; however, if anything was going to inspire me, it was the cinematic experience that I had last night. I would venture to say that “The Diving Bell And The Butterfly” is among the best films that I have ever seen in my entire life. Seriously.
It’s the true story of French fashion magazine editor Jean-Dominique Bauby who, in his forties and the prime of his life, awakens from a stroke paralyzed and with “locked in syndrome,” meaning he is conscious and alert, but cannot speak. He can only blink his left eye. His therapists develop an elaborate system that allows him to communicate one blink at a time – which he uses to painstakingly dictate his memoirs, upon which the film is based.
It’s impossible to read even a sentence of Bauby’s miraculous memoir without an awareness of the monumental exertions it must have taken him to write it. Painstakingly dictated, one letter and one blink at a time (his eyelid being the only muscle he could control), it’s the work of a fantastically keen and witty mind, trapped in a vegetative state.
The film is flawlessly put together from start to finish. The brilliant performances by every single cast member are striking and genuine. Shannon and I have been endlessly discussing how much this film makes you think. What would you say if you had to blink out each letter of each word? Which people in your life would come and visit you in the hospital? Who would take the time to read to you, talk to you, to communicate through blinking? At a time like this, it would certainly become very clear who your true friends are. And the other question that begs to be asked is, if Bauby was able to write this book with only his mind and his left eye, then what else are we as human beings capable of and what is stopping us? Moving, inspiring, emotional, breathtaking and dynamic, this story is captured with a kind of beautiful touch that I can only describe as magical. I cried at different times throughout the film, but it was when the credits began to roll that my eyes absolutely filled up with tears.
I find myself still welling up at the thought of it and wanting to tell every single person I’ve ever met that they need to go and see this movie. This story really makes you realize what is truly important. The phrase “triumph of the human spirit” hovers over “The Diving Bell And The Butterfly.” You have to go and see this film. Experiences like this do not come along very often.
The sun on my face has felt so good these last couple days. It has been quite a lovely weekend of getting glammed up, going out on the town, good food, good friends, family time, walks on the beach, genuine laughs, cowboys, Coronas, minor hangovers and reconnecting myself with what I felt I had been missing. People you can say anything to, because it’s okay to be who you are.
I’m reading the most beautiful novel, The Diving Bell And The Butterfly. I can’t wait to see the film. I love French films.
I reread something I’d written late last year about being sleepless-and I realize it’s no different now. Still the prettiest disposition. Still soft words and kind eyes. Still. Still. Still.
I am never sure whether all the people I love understand the way my mind is working these days. I am trying not to worry- but certain topics always make me sigh.
I am going to bed with gravol and music, to soothe me into dreams.
Photo: heartfulhome on Flickr
Christian, in his beautiful french accent, once said, “I’ve had better days…like, all of them.” That’s how I feel today.
It was one of those terrible, horrible, no good, very bad mornings.
Like I really needed a flat tire thrown into the mix. I heart BCAA.
Happy freakin’ Valentine’s Day.
I’m trying my best to smile through it.
Photo: Jessica Smith
I woke up to love and wisdom from Thailand in my inbox this morning. There is comfort in the idea that my cheerleader is still so accessible, even when she’s thousands of miles away. She knows just what to say; to shake me up and make me feel better at the same time. Angels of this kind are rare.
I bought two new pairs of tights last night. I love tights and I wish that I could wear them every day.
Sounds like Shaq will play his first game in a Phoenix Suns uniform tonight.
Cristi is trying to feed me double baked almond croissants from Thomas Haas.
Matt has finally come clean about his involvement in Hungarian Wrestling.
I am going to go see a chick flick with Shando tonight and I can’t wait.
I want to write a book. I want to write it in innocence and nakedness of spirit (Thomas Wolfe).
So this what they call “crunch time.” I am pretty much stressed to the max. Up against a wall, with my nose to the grindstone. I’m a jumble of nerves. Today, I just needed to get ‘er done. So, I put my headphones in and turned up the volume. With Beautiful Midnight blasting, I attempted to shut out every other person in the building as I plowed away at my work load. The days are numbered. The target is high. The pressure is on. It’s a pressure unlike anything I’ve ever experienced. All that I can do is work as hard as I possibly can and hope to God that it pays off.
I went for a run tonight, to blow off steam…then I came home and worked away some more. I’m irritable and I’m emotional. I’m also pretty stoked about the pint of Ben & Jerry’s Half Baked that’s sitting in my freezer. Ice cream cures stress, right Patz?
I’m learning so much right now.
So I will try my best to keep all the thoughts and lessons straight.
I will try my best to keep my head above water,
to keep everyone content,
to keep phones ringing with good news,
to keep the soul in what I’m doing.
This is hard. But this is good.
And I am figuring it out. I am.
Before I let it catch the air-before that space is full of words again.
(do we not all lose strength when we let words get away?)
